Are You Proud of Yourself? ⚡ Jay’s SCOOP | Ep. 473

Jay Schwedelson: We are back for do this, not that podcast. And normally on this show, I come on, I talk about some tips and tactics you should try for email or social media or whatever. But also every so often I wanna share what's going on. In my brain, what I struggle with and what you may struggle with as well.

Jay Schwedelson: There's a lot of podcast episodes that are out there that tell you, you know, you can do it. And then you see all these big, famous, important people saying all these things about how you can overcome and do and whatever. And I try to listen to a lot of those shows. I do. I listen to the Mel Robbins show. I list, I, I mean, you name it, I listen to it.

Jay Schwedelson: Uh, because one of the things I think that's hard for everybody, it doesn't matter if you are the CEO of a big company, if you're a solopreneur, uh, if you're a marketing manager at some. You know, decent sized company. If you're unemployed, you're out there looking for a job. If you are spinning a million plates, you got a bunch of kids that you're trying to take care of, or you have elderly parents or something, that's not well.

Jay Schwedelson: Um, the thing I don't think enough that's talked about is how much everybody, and I do mean everybody, I don't care if you're the most famous person on the planet. Everybody's got a lot of stuff that they're dealing with, and while they may seem like they're just smooth sailing on the inside, they're not.

Jay Schwedelson: They're not. And there are certain things that I've been able to realize that have helped me get through those moments that are sometimes harder than others. And I think at the, during the holiday season, into the start of any new year. There's a lot of moments of reflection. How am I doing? Oh no, I'm not doing great.

Jay Schwedelson: I need to do better. I gotta step it up. I can't do it. Self-doubt, negative self-talk. All the things. We all do it. But one of the things that I've realized, I guess kind of recently that has helped me out a lot is this idea of almost looking at myself in different periods of time. What do I mean by that?

Jay Schwedelson: So. What if I said to you, what is one thing that you are grateful for that your past self had the courage to do? This is the thing that's been sitting with me a lot. There are things that I've done, I'll give you an example that I've done years ago that if I had not done those things, I would be in a much worse position than I am today.

Jay Schwedelson: And when I look back at this, I say, wow, Jay, I almost wanna high five myself from a few years ago and say, I can't believe that you stepped it up and you did that thing because had you not done that thing, we'd be in a really bad spot right now. But you did do it, and I'm grateful that my younger version of myself did that.

Jay Schwedelson: I'm not talking about like 20 years ago, I'm talking about in the last few years and why this is so impactful for me. Is that when you realize that that slightly younger version of yourself did certain things and those certain things, and you're so shocked that that version of yourself did them, and they got through it, and they, they, they made these strides, right?

Jay Schwedelson: And then you say, wow, what am I doing now? What am I doing today that a few years from now, my older self, my future self, is gonna be wanting to high five me right now That I had the courage to do that. I wasn't too afraid to do that. I actually did that thing. I'll give you a great example for me. So when COVI.

Jay Schwedelson: Was going on. Um, you know, I had this, this advertising agency and I have a, a payroll, pretty big payroll every single week. And, uh, during COVID, all of, a lot of our advertising agency clients, you know, were freezing their budgets because people were just, weren't marketing the same way. And I really didn't want to, you know, let go of people.

Jay Schwedelson: I didn't wanna furlough people or any of that stuff. And it was a very, very difficult time for my business. And that is the moment where during COVID where I said, okay, what else can I do? How can I, uh, generate more business? How can I meet a lot of new people? What can I do? And I said, you know, maybe I could put on a virtual conference and that way will help me network.

Jay Schwedelson: It'll be a new business for me. Maybe a new income stream. I don't know. And it was during COVID, it was during that moment where I said I, I was on a walk with my wife. And she had heard me talk about this idea of putting on a, a virtual conference for a long time. And she goes, well, why don't you just do it?

Jay Schwedelson: What are you waiting for? And I said, well, I've never done one. I don't even know where to start. I don't even have a name for this thing. I don't even think people would show up. I, you know, a hundred difference, I don't think. And she said, well, what do you got to lose? And that's how Guru Conference was born.

Jay Schwedelson: And for those of you who don't know what that is, that's this giant free virtual conference that's about email marketing. And we did that conference, it turned into other conferences and turned into a whole business, a whole thing. And I don't wanna make it sound like it was all rosy when I first started Guru Conference, it was not easy.

Jay Schwedelson: I didn't, I, I, when I say I didn't know what I was doing, I did not have a clue. I didn't know where to begin. I was so far into this world, I knew nothing, right? But every day I said, just take one step at a time, figure stuff out and try. And there were a lot of sleepless nights, very hard. And coming outta COVID, my agency was able to survive.

Jay Schwedelson: COVID. Okay. And the Guru conference, um, after year one really took off. And it's one of those things that I look back now and I say to myself from four or five years ago, I said, Jay, good job, dude. I can't believe that you were brave enough to do that. I don't think I'm brave enough to do that today. And I was like, really good job.

Jay Schwedelson: And the reason that helps me now is that it fuels me to say, okay, what am I doing today? Right? What am I doing today that my future self is going to be happy I did. And it doesn't have to be starting a giant virtual conference. Okay. I think the biggest mistake that people make about their business life, their professional life, their personal life, is they think it has to be this monumental change.

Jay Schwedelson: It does not. Okay? You need to be brave for 10 seconds, whatever it is. What do I mean by that? Okay. Let's say, um, there's somebody you, you want to connect with on LinkedIn. Let's say there's somebody you want to email for that opportunity. Let's say, um, there's somebody out there that you know you wanna network with at an event.

Jay Schwedelson: You don't need to be this brave, courageous person with this overall huge plan. No, you need to be brave enough for 10 seconds to send that LinkedIn connection. That custom note, you need to be brave enough that when you're at that networking event, that you walk up to the person at that event that you think might have an impact on your career, your business, your life, and say, excuse me, I just wanna get a chance to meet you.

Jay Schwedelson: I'm so and so. You need to be brave for 10 seconds, and then you go back after it's over. Okay? And you could be nervous and scared and be on your own, blah, blah. I can't believe I did that. That was so uncomfortable. But you did it. You need to be brave. For 10 seconds. It's same thing in your personal life.

Jay Schwedelson: Okay, you're out somewhere. Oh, that person's attractive. I would like to meet that person. Maybe you're not one of those people. I certainly wasn't. That would just walk up to somebody like, Hey, hey, what's your name? Who does that? Who actually does that? Other than people that are kind weird and and sketchy and whatever, but.

Jay Schwedelson: For 10 seconds, you can be that person and it's gonna come off authentic. 'cause you don't do it all the time and your future self is gonna be so happy you did. Because that 10 seconds of bravery can lead to a new life, a new opportunity, a new relationship, a new everything. And so I've been giving a lot of thought about this idea of what am I happy that the.

Jay Schwedelson: Slightly younger version of me did in the last few years that I wanna high five myself. And then what am I doing today that a few years from now, that slightly future version of me is gonna wanna high five me today? And this kind of frames my mind to really wanna try things to push a little bit harder to have that 10 seconds of bravery.

Jay Schwedelson: And in general, I know this episode's a little different. You're like, Jay, where's the subject line tips? Where's it all, you know, where's, uh, how do, when do I post on LinkedIn? I get that, and we'll get back to all that. But I do think that, you know, kind of, I, I need to do it all the time and I like to be real and I like, you know, I think it's helpful for everybody to know that we're all in it.

Jay Schwedelson: Not every day you wake up like, yeah, I'm crushing it today. You know, there are days that you wake up, you're like, uh oh. It's all, you have this catastrophic mindset, which we need to get out of, right? It's something that we all deal with. It's something everybody deals with, and for some reason it feels more comfortable knowing that we all deal with it.

Jay Schwedelson: So. You got this. We all got this. And, uh, listen, if this was the worst episode ever, I apologize, but sometimes, especially as we start out the year, I wanna kind of reframe my mind. So that's what I'm thinking about. So thanks for checking this one out. We'll get back to the random tips and see it the next one.